Paying the Bet

Nothing exciting to blog on my weekend as it was very busy with real life and bad weather. Not a bad weekend by a long shot as I spent time inspired by a workshop I helped out with and fun birthday party for my nephew but not the stuff a blog like this is about.

One disgusting thing, I lost a bet with Rebound on whose college basketball team would go farther in the tournament. Fortunately this will be a one year abnormality. Anyway the bet was not big but tougher then one might think but I was forced to wear a jersey of his team and nothing else for Saturday evening and of course him and Rock fucked me while I wore it. Too bad their team lost that night…

I potentially met a man that might want to take me for a spin Saturday. He is studying to be a social worker after a decade of being in the Navy and was at the workshop to learn about a topic near and dear to my heart. Plus he was cute as hell, he was short probably only in the mid five feet range but had just piercing blue eyes and what appears to be quite a put together body. He just looks like a guy who only would have one speed (fast) in the sack and that he could go on forever. Nice, cute, ex-military and wanting to help foster kids, definitely doable!

He lives an hour plus away but he has already emailed me once with definite flirting so I like where this could head.

SC: Stripping and Being a Nympho

Stripping and Sex Chronicles - I will occasionally write on these subjects that do not really have anything directly with being a hotwife sex object/toy. I do this for two reasons, they are topics of interest on my part and people are always asking me questions in particular about my past as a stripper. Although the industry likes to emphasize the occupation as a dancer, for ease of communication I always just go with stripper.

I am open about my life. People who have my past tend to be either too much information or too little. I tend to be the too much information type and part of not having any family by blood and my volunteer work with children that were like me I tend to like to shake people a little who are more numbed by how most talk about things. So in this case I am not ashamed of my past as a stripper or do I hide my battles with my compulsions I have to deal with which one is sexual.

The common question I get when people know these two particular things about me is did I go into stripping because of my sex addiction and did stripping hurt as in part of a downward spiral with my sex addiction.

Well the answer is not one part of me became a stripper because of my sex compulsion. As it turned out it actually helped, not that I would recommend it for others. First I started to learn, deal and control my compulsion almost two years before I started stripping and had my downward spiral and hitting bottom already. I was worried about how it would affect me but other factors made me not hesitate going into the profession.

What I found out was the energy given out and the sexual nature of the job help dissipate my sexual drive. I worked full time for six years which was pretty much 4-5 shifts a week. A shift of dancing, dealing with men and just the whole atmosphere allowed me not so much to exchange it with sex but allowed my sexual cravings to not add up which compulsion is a huge thing as the desperation to get the itch scratches builds and builds and stupid and dangerous behavior follows.

Now do not get me wrong there is a difference between being horny and enjoying sex and the irrational craving and coping self medication of someone feeding a compulsion. I was not remotely celibate during my years dancing but it was helpful in dealing with the craving aspect.

I want to write more in depth later about why do women and in particular I go into a profession like stripping later but the ultra quick answer to why for me was to provide a roof over my head and food in my stomach.

Sexual Compulsions

Going to be serious in this entry so you have been warned.

Spring is often a difficult time for me. There is something about the warm weather as we escape the clutches of winter. Maybe it is the wearing of less clothes that makes me feel sexier or maybe it is how I react to spring fever but I get so insatiably horny that I often trip up healthy behavior and go into my sexual compulsion area which is bad.

Nymphomania, sex addict, hypersexuality and sexual compulsion and who knows maybe other terms are thrown out to describe what a person like me has. Unfortunately over the years between titillation, ignorance and cheap excuse making this problem has often been portrayed as cute or that it is pure fiction. Heck I like to be quick to sum up my healthy sexual appetite as being a nympho because people can get it.

I want to address both sides quickly.

The people who go that there is no such thing as a sex addict are either incredibly stupid or being incredibly too narrow in what they are trying to state. That is because they point to the fact that sexual addiction is not a biological addiction like drugs and alcohol can be. Where trying to stop is physically painful with real physical reactions to withdrawal. But what they ignorantly do not know or just leave out of convenience is sexual addiction may not have the biological and physical characteristics it very much mirrors the destructive behavior that those do and it takes far more then just do not do those stupid things to deal.

Those people who take light of people that have this. Look as I wrote before slang for be always horny in a perfectly healthy way is cool with me and I use it myself. But often people who do know people like me where they can see the destructive behavior still do not treat us similar to other addicts. In fact more prone to use that knowledge to score with us, basically “hey Crystal had a rough day she will fuck anything tonight.”

The difference between a healthy high sex drive and hypersexuality

A person with a healthy sex drive even if that is fucking near non stop is simply a person who is basically having sex just to enjoy sex and does not let that impact other parts of their life. A person with sexual compulsions will have sex for many reasons, almost always sub-consciously and it negatively impacts multiple areas of their life.

For example, two women blowing guys in the back alley of a bar one night, both are married but their husbands do not know and would despise it but they do it anyway. Now both are impacting their marriage in a negative way but that would not make both have a problem. If one girl is only putting her marriage on the line then she is not suffering from hypersexuality. But the other woman at that same time she is blowing the stranger is suppose to be on the other side of town feeding her children dinner, missing work to the point of losing her job and things like that she could very well have a problem.

For example after a sexual escapade a woman basked in the glow of it and thought back pleasantly with thoughts of if and when I do something like that again probably did not do it out of compulsion. But if the woman beat herself up and knew she would after and still knows that she will not only do it again but will need to do it again very soon that person could very well be sick.

Origins of hypersexuality

Most studies trace hypersexuality back to one or a combination of abuse, neglect or abandonment in childhood. Probably exceptions and not all who suffered these things become hypersexual. Foster children like me are prone to have it because quite simply there is a reason why we are no longer with our parents and the system breeds these situations that most foster kids have to endure some combination of these things.

Compulsive behavior comes out of some behavior that somehow goes astray. Children to survive the things mentioned before develop survival skills, coping mechanisms and self defense behaviors. As a child though they do not know what they are or how to not do them when a threat has disappeared so behaviors get mashed and exaggerated until a compulsion comes out of it. So for example a very common compulsion for a foster kid to have and one I have is a tendency to horde food. What starts out in many of us not knowing when we will get fed again defense mechanism turns into an irrational compulsion.

Why is sex such a big one then?

I will use me as an example.

Grew up having nothing bouncing around from foster placement to foster placement and in and out of group homes which means you learn that any day anything you become attached to in some way can go poof. Forget school choir why practice the songs and never get to perform them. Forget sports as your new home might not allow it or a coach thinking you will just go poof takes no stock in you. Forget friends you learn not to get close to people because you will disappear.

One thing any adult who grew up in multiple foster homes will tell you is they felt like an object. The object was wanted in that home for the monthly check, free maid, babysitter, sex toy, stress/hate outlet punching bag, substitute daughter who grew up and left and other things but none based on the child Crystal. Then puberty hits and I discover that sexual acts can be quite enjoyable and an orgasm is incredible and a high that cannot compare to anything else and coming from where I am that is a huge difference.

Sex is free and does not cost money I do not have. Sex is a great escape as it is intense enough to forget my life when in the middle of doing it. Sex is something that I can offer to someone to make me have some value other then just another object. That other girl does not put out or let you fuck her in the ass or give her a cum facial but I will. Oh and I can get things through sex all the better.

So sex becomes this all fix it consuming thing but I am still a trouble immature teenager so it starts off as a survival/coping things and turns into a compulsion. In some ways how could it not. Want fun in my life, sex. Want to be desired, sex. Want to get something and nothing else to offer, sex. Want to feel something other then something negative, sex. It becomes quite easy for sex to get screwed up in the mind.

Myths of sexual compulsion

1) The sex is not enjoyable. This myth comes out of all the people trying to use the sex addict things as a defense telling their spouses this. Can the sex suck, sure, but the actual sex feels often like a healthy person that has sex and that the enjoyment factor will have a spectrum based on many factors. But it is extremely empty feeling and often the chase to score and the after it is over can be quite empty and troubling.

So someone who is healthy gets laid they might enjoy the pursuit, the act, and bask in the glow of a great time maybe days afterwards. A sex addict might only find enjoyment in the act itself and afterwards sucks. In this way it does mirror actual substance addictions. Obsession and selfish behavior to score and hating oneself and feeling like crap afterwards by it being so temporary is the norm.

But know the sex can be very pleasurable. Think of it this way, the night partying and getting drunk was a blast but the next day really sucks. One might state and believe getting drunk sucks but the truth is the drunken part was far from sucking to that person.

2) To cure a sex addict means 12 step program or other ways to minimalize sex. For many a twelve step program works and more power to them but where people like to be dismissive to this being a biological addiction then one must also be ok with not needing some cold turkey thing. Most people I know that suffer from hypersexuality the process is simply recognizing the feelings and behaviors that trigger it and learning to divert and cope until it passes. So for example I get into a dark mood which will ignite it now I know I am in a dark mood and know my thoughts and desires are something I should not act upon. But none of this actually has to do with the actual sex drive in a person who suffers from this.

3) It is not about amount of sex. A person having sex ten hours a day could be totally healthy if they need little sleep, do not need a job and have no other commitments for example. A person just having sex once a week for an hour though could be seriously in trouble. Because the rest of the time the person might be behind their computer searching for their next time or stoking the next time up by spending all of their time with pornography in lieu of working, spending time with their family and things of that nature.

The next time you know or hear someone using the sex addict reason for why they had an affair it is possible it is a bull shit excuse. But it is also possible it is true. The next time a significant other thinks you have a problem it maybe they just have a significant lower sex drive then you and it sucks or maybe you might want to step back and look at your life just to make sure.

I am a sex addict who just happens to have to work on managing it while still having a very high sex drive that I very much try to satisfy. They do not have to contradict each other.

Life Can Be Funny

Sometimes life can feel like one big play of the comedy genre. So Tuesday I have a date with a guy that I thought would end up with me getting a nice pounding and back to Rock for even more but the guy and I did not remotely click.

So now comes Thursday early evening and I am at a bookstore when I spot a man who is looking at me. Not just a man but the exact type that makes me instantly want to strip out of my clothes lie down and spread my legs. He had to be in his forties black and thick everywhere arms, torso and legs but the piece of resistance though a shaved head but with a touch of gray in a goatee. If Rock in the next few years starts going grey he is going to have to worry about getting fucked to death by me because the timing of what turns me on the most is going to line up with my sexual peak years.

What though was really incredible about this evening is we both had the look. You know the look we all get when there is just a flat out attraction we can do nothing about it to salvage pride or our ego but just look. Most of the times we play strategy or coy when we find someone attractive when we are looking and we play conscious games, but when we get this look we are just gone. Both of us had that.

But as I referenced above life can be funny in a cruel way. I was with my little sisters, I volunteer as a big sister, and when I am with them I consciously act like super duper role model deluxe because they need that the most. No flirting and picking up of men in their presence!

So two people go their separate ways and I can only hope he might think of me in a lewd way a little. I will definitely be going back to that store in the near future.

Common Question III

How did you and your husband get started in the Hotwife life?

A crazy chick puts a personal ad about wanting to be in a long term relationship where sexual objectification could be maxed out in a healthy and realistic way. I imagined a life of being mostly thought as first a sex toy for my husband. I always loved movies where it was usually some criminal who would be talking business with someone with scantly clad woman(en) in the background and with a look or snap of a finger she comes over and does something blatantly sexual without any other thought in the world as that is her only reason for being there.

Rock put in an ad wanting a woman who would ooze sex and strive to be some super slut. He imagined a woman who he could share the world with sexually and make it the core of their relationship.

He wrote me, I read his ad and as he wrote it was obvious we had to learn more about each other and the rest is a wonderful seven plus years.

It Happens

My date was basically a bust. It had promise as the man knew I was married and still asked me out which is always a good sign. I like aggressive men. On the negative side he was only twenty-four. Rock really would like me to hook up with some younger men as he likes the idea of me getting rammed all night long by a guy that gets it up minutes after cumming.

But I am an old thirty and grew up fast and way mature for my age all along the way. Add to the fact I do not and really never have drank I really have not much in common with people in their twenties. I always dug older people and especially so sexually. So going out with a guy who might only know drinking as part of dating and cock sure of the world from barely living in it is going to be high risk.

That was what basically happen. We did not have much in common as all he could talk about was him knowing everything about others in his field do not know which is always a yawn and way too much about music his passion. My knowledge is how long and how good a song is to dance to in music. He seemed thrown off by my lack of drinking and clueless to obvious flirts like they could not be intentional if I was sober. Even trying to steer the conversation to sex was a bust.

Oh well, better luck next time.

If It Wasn’t Hard

No this entry is not an ode to a hard cock although I am sure I will write about that soon. No the title was meant to refer to “If it wasn’t hard it would not be worth it”.

I am going on a date tonight. I hate dates. For me the seduction, chase and all the dressings to get someone in bed is work for the reward of sex. I can sometimes enjoy these things but mostly it is like working out to keep an attractive figure, the working out is not enjoyable but the benefits of it more then make up for working out and make it far easier to do. I am all about enjoying physical foreplay and hardcore sex then any of the flirting or will we or won’t we stuff that goes on. 

This is why I enjoy regulars. To become a regular for me is for the man to be able to reduce me to pretty much just a sexual object to be used. Sounds like many of men fantasies of I am horny I will just get with this woman and be done a short time later. But many men are just not like that. They like much of the romance and dating things as well as most women just maybe not to the degree.

As spring comes I have to get my ass in gear. I am really only down to one actual regular man. Rebound does not really count as he is practically family and has had me so many times that Rock does not get a special charge out of me doing him. So I am not holding my end up of our commitment we made in our marriage if I was just to rely on just one or two regulars and friend fucking. 

I dislike the word cuckold. Most who think that work think of either a poor schlep who does not know his wife is stepping out on him or some submissive man who is getting humiliated and/or cannot please his other sexually so she fucks other men. Certainly by definition most women even women like me who cheat with full encouragement of their spouse makes their men cuckolds. But I have a hang up as Rock is wonderfully awesome in the sack and habitually proud and turned on when I fuck other men which is far from humiliated. Hell he loves people knowing us that his wife is a cheap slut. Maybe the best way to put this is he gets far more turned on to see me with dried cum on some part of my face or tit area, my hair all messed up and reeking of just got seriously fucked then for me to spend hours looking my best and wait for him in some new lingerie with candles lit in our bedroom. In fact if their was makeup sold to simulate dried cum, perfume that smelled like stale after the fact sex and hair product to get that morning tramp coming home look he would so have me look like that 24/7.

Rock loves when I am fucking behind his back. In fact our biggest problem and my biggest obstacle when we started to take this seriously was doing this. One of the things he really likes is for me not to give him any clues until after the fact. Sure there are sometimes signs and obvious actions. I will walk out of our home tonight dressed to impress and not like it is going to be a ladies night out. But I have not done this that often and most of my behind the back non regular action has been spontaneous. But that is why I need to make a better effort. Rock still is getting more of a thrill from my blowjob to the furnace guy in the morning and hotel romp in the afternoon with a relative stranger a month or so ago then the fun we this past Saturday when it was the normal group. 

So here is to working it to get laid. Because without the work it might not be worth it and at least Rock will appreciate the possibility if the date turns out to be nothing.

Basketball vs Two Women

Had a real nice Saturday, knew what to expect because this type of thing happens quite a bit. In fact more like routine when there is some big sport thing and we can get together.

Anyway Sweetness and Lips came over to our house around noon. While the men went to become couch potatoes we girls went out to grab some lunch and do some shopping. Now what type of shopping do two horny women do? Well of course shopping for Lips and Sweetness boy’s birthday silly people! Three stops later after finding the video game we think he wanted at Target we were on our way home.

When we arrived rebound had joined the men proving me wrong and Rock right. Rebound had stated he did not know if he could make it but Rock was right in assuming the chance to play with Lips would make his schedule pop open. After some small talk with the guy Lips and I retired to the bedroom. There we got ready to have some fun. Mine took longer as I had to do some prep work on myself for we all knew Sweetness wanted my ass. But once done I joined Lips in bed.

There we waited and pace ourselves which is to say Lips lipped locked me and just a nice quiet time for a little bit waiting for our first man. Rebound was the first to choose two naked and horny women over basketball. The game must not have been good because he was there faster then we thought. One of the things that I love about having people in your life that are regulars to your bedroom is how much more relaxed and fun sex can be. Everyone can just enjoy themselves and familiarity may not bring pure excitement but it also does not bring questions and stresses. In this case Rebound was going to pay attention to Lips as he can get me practically anytime and he probably had not played with Lips in over six months.

Watching Lips give a blow job can be intimidating. I like to think I give good oral and I have been told I can give good oral but whenever I am around her I feel like at best a cheap imitation. She truly looks like she is making soft sweet romantic love to a cock with her mouth. I swear she could get a straight man interested in sucking a cock the way she makes it look like it is so much fun. Of course I am bias as I do think it is awesome! After the preliminaries, we settled in on Rebound taking her missionary and me helping out by licking her clit and occasionally Rebound’s cock.

After Rebound had finished up and left us to return to watching basketball Sweetness came into the bedroom about ten minutes later. Now it was my turn to get all the attention as both Lips and sweetness took turns both eating me out and rimming. Simply amazing and if I ever get tired of something like that then I will have become seriously fucked up somehow. An inside joke amongst us is for me to be called asshole when Sweetness plays with me. The man likes his anal sex and Lips says no no no to her ass. So most of the time his cock ends up in my ass and this time was no exception. While he fucked my ass Lips was sweet and played with my tits and kissing me.

Rock playing the good host in theory came in fairly soon after Sweetness finished up with us. Of course I know he likes all the senses and the visual of well used women so I guess it is a win win thing. When Rock wandered in I head my face buried in Lips pussy eating her out and continued as Rock got his cock sucked by Lips for awhile. Then for the finally of the afternoon Rock took Lips on a wonderful ride doggie style while I just gently caressed Lips in various places.

A very nice and enjoyable afternoon hopefully had by all but at least I know I enjoyed it. No repeat today, both of Rock and my teams are playing this afternoon. I mean sex is great but since you cannot do it 24/7 might well plan some other things.

Feel me up!

I have always loved getting my tits fondled. I mean from my blog title and the nature of this blog stating I am easy is quite redundant. Pretty much someone gets to second base with me I am pretty much helpless to resist anything further if I theoretically wanted to. It really does not have to do with physical sensation as my experiences with being with other women and talking about it in general I place my sensitivity of my breast as only average. 

There is just something about not only getting felt up but visually as well. When I see other women getting felt up it arouses me instantaneously. The sexiest thing though by far is when a person fondles me by getting their hand underneath my shirt whether from the top of an open blouse or coming up underneath. I just think when I am getting felt up it is a signal to my brain that I am now being thought of as a sex object by the other person and my brain can check out of all the other things I am and focus in on my favorite thing.

One time Rebound stayed over on a Saturday night and I entertained him to about one in the morning in the slut (guest) room and stumble back to Rock in the Master bedroom. Well Rock was not going to just let me go to sleep so I did not end up actually falling to sleep until around 2:30. I heard Rebound up too early the next morning, I am so not a morning person, so I dragged myself out of bed because I wanted to make him breakfast before he left. Rebound was in the mood for a morning fuck and I was not responding as we played the game of talk, making breakfast and him trying to get me to do something sexual. Rock walks into the kitchen and sees what is going on and my apparent lack of sexual interest and tells Rebound to start playing with my tits. Well in about two minutes from not really interested to on my knees blowing him with enthusiasm all from just my tits getting played with.

The state I stripped in had some of the most, if not the most relaxed rules in what can be done. Pretty much for $20 a dance touch anything that was not covered which the only thing being covered was what a G-string covers. So this meant the men got to feel you up as long as they paid the money. The state right next/short drive from us was a no contact state in its rules. Well between the dancers that worked their way through the clubs and ventured in from that state many had a very difficult time letting the men touch them let alone grope them. So along with the other dancers who preferred minimal tit groping and men coming from the non contact club experience I would often have to when giving the men a dance not only place their hands on my tits, common procedure in the club, but often if I took my hands off their hands their common reaction was to stop feeling them often. I would get so disappointed and we would repeat this step until it sunk into their heads it was ok with me to feel them up as long as they paid. It definitely helped me be a popular dancer!

Why We Do This

I have a big interest and natural thought process for human psychology especially in terms of understanding people’s motivations and therefore predict their behavior. It comes out of needing this skill as a survival skill in my younger days but it has also turned into a genuine interest.

Over the years I have talked and discussed my practicing of the Hot Wife experience on message boards and in other avenues. I also have read other blogs over the years and come to the conclusion people into this do it for different reasons. Wow, was that brilliant insight. Stay tuned for my theory that two plus two equal four.

Here are some of the reasons I see:

1) Fantasy Land – These are the people pretending their life. It is the male cuckold who is always claiming his wife is having unprotected sex with an unlimited amount of strangers and having children that are not theirs usually of different color. It is a woman who is bored and becomes a serial internet dater by creating profiles on personal sites and blogging about her experiences that are of the write for months then describe some magical meeting then the person is gone from their life. I mean spend months to have a one nighter? It is tough to get a man to complete one sentence when they know it is just a one time shot. They never meet and the overly romantic story is to keep their readers thinking they are being honest.

2) Lust of the Dance – I think this makes up most of what I read about. Women for the sex is pretty much a byproduct of what they want and pursue. These women love the whole chase and pursuit that men go through to get with them. It makes them feel sexy, wanted and some excitement to their lives. They are hot wives as they do have sex with some men but they are often event based and each time even with the same man needs some form of buildup. I think these are the female equivalents to many of the men that go to strip clubs. Not about being horny but enjoying a little escapism of a pretty female acting like they are interesting, glad to be talking/dancing to them and sexually desirable. 

3) Flirtatious Fun – Men and women that love flirting and teasing from the physical sensations it gives them which sex being the nice climax to the whole thing. These are the more hands on and less serious Lust for the Dance types.

4) Excitement Addicts – Simply put same old same old is boring and something new and different is not and therefore better.

5) Just Sex Please – This is the group I belong to. It is about the enjoyment of fucking and how fucking makes us feel. The pursuit and capture is the work that has to go into it to get our reward. We are far more likely to try to have one or more regulars then constantly be in a flirt mode and make them pursue us type dance.

Saint Pat’s Day

Hope everyone had a good one.

Rock and I do not drink and I do not do anyone while they have been and neither of us is Irish. So needless to write that this is not usually a day of any special consequence and one quite frankly I usually tune out as I hate drunks.

But it turned out to be a very cool day. The weather people were accurate and we had our first warm open up the windows and breathe the fresh air and wear less clothes day. I decided to get into the holiday spirit and put on my green bikini and thought it would be a nice thing for Rock to come home to as he has been chomping at the bit for warmer weather to come so I would be wearing less.

Then surprise number two appeared at the door just after five in the presence of one of my regulars Shock. Now he was overdue for a visit but being St. Pat’s day and Shock being one to have an alcoholic beverage I just was assuming he would not be calling today.

Shock normally shows up a little later but hey for the most part is there really a bad time when nothing really is going on. I lead him to the great room because the way the sun and breeze was in there I really wanted to do it in there.

Then as Shock was pounding me hard from behind Rock enters the home and gets a cool St. Pat’s Day present himself that I would have not guessed that for him was way better then just me in a green bikini.


FYI – Read a blog yesterday of a woman who clearly had a high opinion of herself or a very low opinion of every one else. She had come to the conclusion that those who read her blog but do not post comments must be reading it just to masturbate. Surprising both in the stupidity and the fact her blog is on the thought of possibly pursuing a sexual relationship outside of her marriage and it has been a year and half and she still just writes about it. The few posts I did read would make it some of the worse masturbation material that I have seen.

For the record anyone who does read my blog I could care less the reason. If your bulimic and this can induce vomiting, if you are have trouble falling a sleep and this knocks you out or any other reason please no worries on my end. Heck I doubt there will be much here to masturbate to but that is cool too.

Common Question II

Why do you and Rock love you being a Hot Wife and making an effort to sexually objectify you?

There are many reasons for both of us. Mine are I enjoy sex immensely and have few other things in my life, especially in my past, where I had any enjoyment so sex became dominant in my brain to the point of sexual compulsion. I do get self esteem boosts when people sexually objectify me and especially when they fuck me. It just a quick fix and I now know is fake but I also know I enjoy it and I know it does not take away from something else. In other words, being objectified does not make me lose IQ points.

So I like sex, I like looking and feeling sexy and I like others to view me that way. We all like others to view us a good light for things we like or identify with so why cannot I enjoy it in this area?

The last thing I like being this way is I think it is a simpler life for me. I know what boys and some girls want and I am more then willing to give them it. I have control of this compared to so much other junk in life in which I so not or will never have.

Now why Rock is practically insatiable in wanting people to fuck his wife’s brains out probably has several reasons as well.

Rock is a functioning sex obsessed man. In other words he can live a multi-faceted life while always having sex on the brain. In his private and free time he would like to have this out in the open instead of some relationship where he has to keep it in his head. He does not want to warm me up every time he wants something sexual. He does not want his view of my body to be of flannel nightgowns and baggy shorts or sweats. He wants a wife who will be dressed for his visual enjoyment, to not have a problem watching TV with his hands all over her day in and day out.

Rock favorite type of sex is rough and degrading type and not all soft and romantic candles and softness. There are probably only so many of us women that can get into that and I think for most of us we need to be primed by getting treated a certain way that being objectified and shared can do.

Rock just is aroused by seeing me get sexually objectified and fucked by others.

It is an over reaction from his first marriage that was to his childhood sweetheart who in the end hated sex. Rock went the opposite way and found his next spouse to be one that was willing to bathe in sex. I thank Lips for giving him such a perfect example of being able to get what he wanted!

I’m Easy with Warm Wet Holes

We are preached by society that people and especially women are not suppose to be sexually objectified. Yet my entire life has shown me that is not only what most people have done to me that at some point I learned that I really preferred that over anything else. But society also preaches we are so many things at the same time. So why cannot be sexually objectified be one of those things and if we excel in one of those things and enjoy it why cannot we specialize in it? 

Between my childhood abuse, endless therapy sessions, my years as a stripper and now being a madly in love hot wife no one who tells me or preached to me that my enjoyment of being sexually objectified and pursuing what makes me happy and in a good place for the first time in my life is so bad. I mean my whole life so many people have made this their preferred view of me so why should I be ashamed and heaven forbid I actually enjoy being objectified. 

Of course the argument is always one note simple. People and especially women who if you allow them to do it to you then they can do it to me. Well sisters I am one chick that had to fight hard in her life just to be in a good and happy place. I have no interest in fighting your battles for you. The problem with these women is they want the good without the bad. They want to dress in a way to feel and look sexy but they do not want just any man to stare at their tits or ass. Well it does not work that way. They want to fuck to satisfy their lust and cravings but heaven forbid others who want that as well approach them let alone seek out doing this with them when they are not attracted or not in the mood.

So sorry you cannot have it both ways. If you want to feel and look sexy, if you want to look attractive to attract a potential other for whatever reason including monogamous long term relationship, you have to accept that men and some women will treat you in a sexually objectified way when the mood strikes or even all the time.

I am fine with you getting mad when you wear a breast revealing blouse and men stare at them. Just be fine when I do it and when the men stare I smile back and give them a better view. Just because you fuck one man when you are in the mood does not mean I cannot fuck more then one man so I appreciate a man hitting on me and being direct.

I am not proud nor am I ashamed that my holes need a lot of cock. It is just me!

Common Question I

What is expected of me in terms of picking up men to fuck?

It is not a simple question because of my issues with sexual compulsion. I plan on writing about that in a more serious entry soon so I will not go into that area with this one but I do have one big boundary to help deal with my sex compulsion. It is when I am down or in a bad mind frame that I intentionally avoid hooking up with anyone outside a regular. I have this boundary because that is when I am weakest and more prone to do really stupid shit because I lose control.

But basically it is what I have written and will write a lot. I am 24/7/365 sex toy. One of my vows to Rock was that my mind will always be open to the possibility of something sexual at anytime with anyone for the most part. But we do not have quotas or I go out specifically looking to get laid. So most days I go out in public and nothing significant happens outside of some flirting maybe.

Then there was a day like a month ago where I blew the furnace guy who came to fix our furnace in the morning and then spent most of the afternoon in a hotel bed with a guest speaker at a function for a group I volunteer for and was my duty to play chauffer to him. On top of that Shock showed up in the evening and there was no way Rock with all this going on was not going to fuck me a couple of times. Now that was an exhausting day!

In the end the answer is it to be natural in the context of I am a sex toy for other people’s pleasure. I think the key is I need to be open to something happening when I am out in the world but not think of it as some sort of mission anytime I am out.

Comfort of Being

One of the true treasures of living this life like we do is how after six plus years of being together we have more enthusiasm and faith that this makes us happier and more loving for each other then we could possibly have guessed. Because we live this 24/7/365 it flows without any extra effort or on the dangerous fuel of false expectations and needing bigger and better events and actions to enjoy it.

What I have seen and read that far too often people only treat a life like a hot wife or whatever cuckold type experience as a series of individual events and especially just something to do on a weekend night for example. The we are normal acting normal unless for a few hour of play on a routine night and that is not Rock and I. Living it like we do makes the highs far less important or even really needed as just the day to day small stuff and maybe more important the potential without pressure of something really nice happening at pretty much anytime time or day.

Rock refers to it as Christmas morning every day. That when he gets home from work there is always a possibility of me sharing a story of what happen to me when he was not around, walking in on me getting my brains fucked out, walking into an empty house and knowing that means I am getting laid somewhere or sitting down to a normal night and never knowing if a regular was to come on by. There is no guarantee and the reality is one of these things does not happen every day. They just happen enough to think something has happen or will happen everyday. 

I was thinking about this because this morning I was reflecting back on my weekend and it was very normal and for us on the mundane side. There was nothing wrong with it. Neither Rock nor I cared that no new story or great sex came out of it. It was just a weekend.

Friday night was just a dinner and movie (Taken). Sure Rock fingered me for much of the movie but in our life watching a movie in a theater if it can be pulled off or watching the TV at home almost always means sexual contact often so nonchalant and irrelevant to my feelings. Saturday night we went to a dinner party for four couples including Rock’s brother and wife, Sweetness and Lips. We have a very active sex life playing with these two but this was an ordinary dinner. But we did not try to get out of the part to have some sexual fun. We have been playing with them for six plus years. Sweetness will have my ass many more times. Lips will make out with me many more hours. It was not some lost opportunity or we would rather but just life. Sunday Rock’s best friend Rebound who is a regular when single came over to watch some basketball. I was royally tag teamed as Rock took my mouth and Rebound took my pussy. A one cum and done thing and quite normal for when the boys are watching their sports on TV and routine as a sunset. 

Being a sex object that gets fucked by many it is not that I am always getting fucked, thinking about getting fucked or anything else sexual in its nature. It is the 24/7/365 knowing that any second I will and that is not only normal but my partner’s strong desire.

One somewhat typical morning

Alarm goes off at 6:30am. Rock is much more of a morning person then me. But my mind has to kick into gear as Rock likes sex of some type in the morning but even when he does not I get up with him and fix his breakfast for him which is usually orange juice, cereal and a piece of fruit. Rock likes variety in the cereal and fruit department.

This morning was extra sleep where Rock hits the snooze button. This just means I will not get anything drawn out in bed. Snooze then basically narrows it down to three things. No sex, sex of some type in the shower or blow job while he eats his breakfast. Rock gets up around 6:50 and does not call me into the bathroom so I now know for certain, unless he infers no, he will be using my mouth at the kitchen table for his pleasure.

I get up and put on a short silk robe. I comb my hair out the best I can after a night of sleep but I can never get it where I wish even with limited expectations. I have straight black hair that should be easier then it is. Once Rock hits the shower I brush my teeth and splash water on my face. Leave the bedroom and head to a spare bathroom. Rock enjoys giving me golden showers a lot but does not do the go to the bathroom while he is in there thing.

I fix Rock’s breakfast and wait for him to come out of the bedroom. Rock designed this weekday morning thing as some type of ritual to start out the day objectifying me and one of the principals was little or no talk and for us not to be love like. I am happy to report I usually keep up my end but Rock often fails. Today he comes up to me and kisses me on my cheek. Who gets tired of that in their relationships!

I serve him his breakfast then I step back, untie my robe and let it fall to the floor where I am standing in a hopefully sexy way. Rock may or may not look when I do this. Expecting him to look is not what an object is about; we do not have feelings or expectations required to please. I then I get under the table, there is no sexy way, and get between Rock’s legs.

I then unzip and pull out his beautiful cock that I still never not get a thrill in doing. I go to give him the best oral I can. I hate giving a blow job when it’s through the fly of a man’s pants. There is just not much to work with and there are less sensory pleasures for me. Another problem with this and Rock’s timetable is that he will usually not cum before he has to leave for work. At some point Rock pushes my head away so he can get his cock to deflate in time so I can put it back in it place. This is torture to a slut like me. A hard cock and it just goes to waste! Damn why is Rock so responsible! He is the boss he can show up late.

When that happens Rock might say some things to make sure we are on the same page or he may not. Once he leaves I pick up and put on my robe, eat my breakfast and clean up. Then it is time for my meditation and work out. I am a serious practicing Buddhist but have many attachments to shed. I like yoga but prefer more movement in exercising but found it works best for me in the winter months. From April through October I generally like to jog, ride my bike and go swimming for my exercise.

Once done it is a shower and I am on with my day…

Snapshot Into My Life

So I claim to be a sex object which includes sex with many men outside of my husband. 

So am I some constantly dressed up looking like a cheap hooker? No
Do I sit at home all day getting laid or masturbating? No
Do you speak like a brain dead bimbo when you are with your husband? No
Do you really just play this for fun a few hours here or there? No
Do you really only have sex with other men just occasionally? No

Then what is your life really like?

Imagine me as a somewhat classy call girl. Educated and living in upper middle class suburbia. To see me in public as a stranger you would not see anything out of the ordinary. To see me on occasion you might notice how I am pretty much always looking like I spent time on my appearance and my clothes are meant to signal I want to project sexy. To know my husband and I and some other people that know us you might have heard rumors or stronger words about my sleeping around or of an open marriage.

But like a classy call girl underneath the surface is a completely different life that revolves primarily around sex. Eating habits and exercise strongly dedicated to because appearance is so important. Neighbors that just cannot figure out what goes on with that house and them but they seem very nice, normal and in love, but why all those cars with single men come over for a short time and leave, including some during the day when hubby is at work. Why is she always in a robe or a bikini so often when I spy on her from our window and see her outside?

Rock, my husband, likes to describe our life like this. Imagine a zealot and perpetually horny but clueless and incompetent pimp who falls in love with his only whore. He wants her always in whore mode and whores her out but just almost always forgets to charge for her services.

Imagine a married woman with children. Ask her who she is? You would probably get a reply like I am a mother first, wife second and so on. Ask her if she is ever not a mother and get a big no! Well I am a sex object for my husband to instruct and play with first with no close second even if the second is all my other wifely duties. Take all the time a normal woman might take for a full time job, being a Mom and the extra chores and other demands being a couple have that my husband prefers I do not worry about. Take all that time and use it to maximizing the sex object life.

It is our real life and not us playing in our life

I live my sexuality somewhat opposite of the rest of Americans. Mine is exaggerated in its importance. Most Americans tend to be dismissive about its importance in a long term relationship. Most women dress based on a combination of their mood and place they will be. My mood is irrelevant and the places have limited choices. Most women who are feeling particularly horny or affectionate might do something extra in their dress and light interactions (flirtatious behavior) with or other leading up to a time to get sex rolling. I dress that extra and concentrate to the point it becomes second nature most of the time that flirtatious behavior but in degrees with other men as well.

But here is the big difference in the mind set. Most other women do these things to get something specific they want, attention, affection and sex. Most women when their husband caresses one of their breasts it is a do I want to move forward to sex or not. Most women when they are hugging their guy and caressing their guy’s crotch with their leg are sending a signal. That is not my life.

Dressing to be sexual is not based on accomplishing anything more then just dressing. My husband or for that matter any man caressing my breast is for their pleasure and if it leads to anything or not is irrelevant to me and has zero to do about my pleasure. When I hug depending on the setting and people they get as sexualized hug standard as appropriate and nothing to do with my mood or motivation. I am sex object for others not myself.

In fact that is how my orgasms are thought about, they are not. Nothing I do, including fucking the goal is orgasms for me. If they happen, and they do, great but not anyone else’s problem. In fact Rock will tell men out right think of me as a whore that you paid a lot of money to. Do you really give a shit about her pleasure because she is going to act like it anyway. I do because I am a sex object first and foremost for others and not just myself, masturbation in private if I really need an orgasm.

I end with one more example of my life. I catch a man looking at my pussy as I am sitting down wearing a short skirt and my legs placed gave him a nice angle in all probability by accident. What do I do? Very simple, let him keep looking unless I can give him a better view with out being too crass. I am a sex object for other’s pleasure.

This Blog and me

Thank you for clicking on this blog. What I expect to be writing in this log is a wide mixture of consciously and severely living and being treated like a sexual object first and a person second between my husband and I. When I mean mixture I mean both from general topics to some specific day to day type stories. From boring mundane to spicy and from keeping it light and not too serious to delving into things, especially in my past, that comes from a very dark place that has deeply impacted how I got to be a sexually objectified wife.

A basic outline of what to expect and what I am going for is a mixture of recaps of some things that happen, specific sex talk and especially how we go to make me be objectified in a very serious and committed way as well as broader subjects. What you will not see in this blog are day to day posts of all the routine things and troubles we all experience. Therefore there is no intention to post something here everyday.

Who am I?

To be introduced to you in public I would be called Crystal. My legal first name is Gloria. My favorite name is the one I am called by my husband in private and that is cunt. For us the name is not meant to be the derogatory definition but meant to convey extreme sexual object. We both thought slut and other terms we tossed around to be too endearing or positive that they lost the goal of re-enforcing my sexual objectification. We love my name cunt we know it is a popular name with life dynamics that are similar to ours but we could care less about being unique. There is just very little way to say cunt and make it come off all cute and cuddly.

I am thirty year old white female. Physically I am 5’ 3” slim because I obsess over it with a tiny bubble butt that most men express wanting to fuck and is probably my best physical feature. I have fake 34C breasts that look bigger because of my small frame. I have black hair and really expressive eyes. In all arrogance my face is just average at best and does not turn heads but my body does. 

I am a mixture of being a total stereotype in some things and bucking very long odds in others. I was abused and neglected as a child by both my parents and taken from them and dumped into the foster care system at the age of six bouncing from single and group homes until aging out. Manage to hit all the abuses in the system especially sexual. At age eighteen and homeless became a stripper or shall I write dancer for six years until marrying my husband of now six years.

For this fairytale like ideal childhood I managed to excel in school to the point of between my child loser status scholarship money and academic scholarships a lot of my college costs were paid for. I obtained a Master’s degree in social work. I do not drink, smoke or do drugs. I did try to escape with drugs as a teenager but they did not work for me. But I also suffer from zero self esteem from the gut and boundaries are intellectual guess points. My life is controlled by many compulsive behaviors or should I say in controlling them and being often obsessed with things needed to be done actually done. One of the biggest and hence this blog is my sexual compulsions.

My life today consists on being the best wife I can be to my husband, volunteer my time for foster teens and being a big sister to a couple of girls. Then outside of regular stuff that we all do the rest of my time is devoted to being a sex object for my husband.

The other part of the equation, my Husband

My wonderful and special husband is a thirty-eight year old black man. With the perfect body of being 6’ 4” and probably easily in the mid two hundred pounds perfectly proportioned model of thick all over with no overly soft spots and only his massive arms are rock hard with muscle definition. He has large powerful hands and a cock to be truly worshiped for its length, girth, stamina and recovery prowess. I call him Rock which is short for him being my “Rock Star and rocking my world”.

Personality wise he exudes self confidence and can charm the panties off any woman and can make any man think he is their best friend in just minutes. His heart is larger then anyone’s that I have ever seen and he spoils me way too much. I maybe be laying it on too thick but after six years of marriage I just love him more and more each day. No way in hell did I think I ever deserved or get this good of a man.

Why he is my beloved opposite for being treated as a sexual object is he is my actual opposite. He has a thing and drive that never tires on thinking and being all things sexual. He has as I have found out an insatiable appetite for his wife to be reduced to a total sex toy driven by being objectified and degraded.

He considers himself a dominant cuckold in which he does not get demeaned by having me fuck other people but just loves it and takes active control in using me by having men fuck me in all types of scenarios. The best way to describe it is how he explained it to me when wooing me. Most men dream after a rough day of work to come home to a wife dressed like a lingerie model with a cold drink in her hand for him, smelling his favorite meal cooking in the oven and relaxing before dinner by watching ESPN while getting a shoulder massage and blow job from his wife. Rock’s perfect coming home after a hard day of work would be by seeing multiple cars in our drive way and when opening the door hearing me get the shit fucked out of me by one man while a couple of men wait for their turn watching me and that guy and ESPN on the couch. Which he would then get them drinks and watch with them and after all of them are done grab me and then take me sexually himself very roughly and verbally assaulting me.

Sexually Objectification what do I mean?

Brief summary as I plan on writing something in more detail but what a typical women might categorize herself as a mom first then wife, daughter and something like that. I am considered first a sex object then the other things and it is not just some cute playful thing. As I will or have already written somewhere else to say we take this seriously might be an understatement. For us this vow and living this way is as important as monogamy vow for most people. To not do this would be an act of betrayal and a declaration of no longer in love with the other.

Rock sums it up in fewer words “My body is be thought of only in sexual terms and all things sexual take priority over anything else except health”. That literally I break our vow if I choose to fix dinner for him or something like that by denying someone something sexual from me. Whether a regular comes over and I was to say no or just cut a session short. Literally sex is always the number one priority.

Cast of Characters

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